sweet v turned 3...

3.16. she turned 3.

3.19. i cuddled her and thought of the moment i first laid eyes on her.

23 trips to haiti.

3 long years.

she is growing with our long distance love.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SfWBnLHfOx0&feature=youtu.be

a reminder of my last night living in haiti...

Thoughts from the evening of Feb. 12, 2014:

At this very moment one year ago I was hugging and kissing our entire Haitian family after they came to visit the boys and celebrate our grand exodus from Haiti.

Our families and friends anxiously awaited our homecoming after four years of adopting from Haiti and seven months of living in country. Thank you to all of you who cheered us on, prayed for us, screamed with us, cried with us, laughed with us, and celebrated with us!

Samantha Bertier, Natalie Claire Holly, Holly Harmon, Joanne Kimball, Diony Monestime, Patrick Bentrott, Ashley Gibson, Mallery Neptune,and Jean Hilaire Filder thank you all for being a magnificent part of the final stages of our journey.

There are so many names I would like to include on this list. Those who weren't there with us in person were with us in spirit. Kelly Lefeber Blanchard, you walked every day of four months of hell with me like a sister and I'm so proud to call you family. There are countless mothers and fathers who have, did, and are walking the land mine that is the path of adoption with us and I want you all to know that you own a special piece of my heart.

I'll never forget our last night among many spent in Haiti. Surrounded by family with eyes full of happy tears. Surrounded by friends who knew how badly I wanted to go home but how hurt I was to close part of this chapter of my life.

Harry Hames thank you for your love and compassion, your loving fatherly spirit and your shared respect and admiration for the people of Haiti. I miss you so much. I'm not sure if I can aptly share with you how special our visits were to me. You are a gem.

Natalie I want to kick trees on swings with you again. Joanne, you saved me by delivering our visas. Diony, you are the most important puzzle piece that without our boys wouldn't be home. Ashley your love for Haiti, her children, and my sweet V helped me get on that plane. Holly, your love and support carried us through so much even long after we came home. Patrick, thank you for coming to our rescue with documents and your amazing sense of humor when I wanted to go postal at Ibesr. I still owe you a prestige for that one. Thank you for being the absolute right person to be there for our final moments and for being our "stand-in" for the happy family photo! Thank you for all you've done for V. I'm happy to call you family as well! Filder my amazing friend, I can't tell you what your friendship means to me. You are an amazing person. Your heart is so gentle and you care for people so well. I admire you and am so happy to call you my friend. Thank you always for our many adventures, even in your pony - which clearly hates me!! Samantha you and your family were a beautiful warm hug for Kelly and I and I cherish you and them. And Mallery, our adventure has only just begun but I thank every star above for you every day. The mold was truly broken with your creation. You are my resuscitation, you are my sanity. You are an amazingly beautiful person, and I'm so honored to have you as a friend. Thank you for everything you do every day, your sacrifices, your love, your dedication and devotion, and your loving and kind heart. The gift of loving V that you give me daily is a debt I will never fully be able to repay.

I miss Haiti so much. I miss momma Epheta, Darline, Darla, the worlds cutest grandpa and grandma, aunts, uncles, and cousins. We never realized how many people we would bring into our lives and our hearts with the special gifts that are our three children.

Stepping down the escalator to the faces of Melissa Bolt Dunkleberger,Teresa Huber, Karyn Puller, and Kate Romero as well as J, Britt, and Leo was exactly the rescue my heart needed to know that no matter where we go people who love us are there. Thank all of you beautiful women for the special people you are.

I hope you all know that we love you and you are in our hearts every single day.

a small dose of healing

the grasshopper, normally extraordinarily agile, took a good tumble today after getting hit in the head with a ball.

he's ok. but it has made me do a lot of reflection on the times he took swipes, dings, bangs, slams, spills, and outright splats on rocks and cement in haiti. there were so many days i couldn't nurse the wounds. so many tears i couldn't wipe away. so many snuggles that didn't happen. so many boo boo's not kissed. like when he split his face open on the shower wall at the orphanage. that one is an ever-present reminder when i look at the scar on the bridge of his nose.

today as he got off the bus with the ice pack on his face and his glasses tucked into his bag for safekeeping because they were sliding off of his swollen face, he stepped into mine and britt's outreaching arms. his bus driver gave her dose of hope that he would heal and rest comfortably over the weekend. leo was behind him holding his bag and his nurse's note. he was enveloped in the love of the family we are. he has us and we have him. and i'm so thankful that we can provide the love and comfort for him that so many children need.

please let your heart love a child from afar today. tonight. right now. please send a little love to a lonely little heart who has a skinned knee. a busted lip. a scraped eye...they need it. they may not feel your touch. but they will feel your heart somehow. there are so many children who need the rescue of a family. they need love.

please also send your love to the families who wait for their children to come home. they long to have their children in their arms. they want to kiss their boo boo's. they are fighting so hard to bring them home. they need your love too because they fear what they don't know is happening to their children. their hearts ache over the time lost to this process. they hurt knowing that they can't nurse their sick children. they can't pick them up when they've fallen. they can't clean up the scraped knee. they can't soothe their pain. they need your love.

this. today. soothing his pain. being there for him. wrapping our arms around him. letting him know it'll all be ok. these are the moments that make everything we did and do worth all of it. all of it. he's here. he has a belly full of pizza, his glasses have been bent back into shape. his fabulous lips are just a little fuller right now. he's surfing the couch like a champ. and he will be ok. and because he will be ok, so will i.